It turns out, quite a lot. Three days after my last post I had a baby via c-section (Not a good time, don't recommend it). Find out I don't actually want to be a working mother, quit working, go back to work part time, get a dog, give the dog away, sleep approximately two hours a night (new baby) and manage to function during the day. (Thank you Pepsi Cola)
Go to Disneyland and Yellowstone and Phoenix twice in 30 days. Paint the house (twice), scoop approximately 30 million shovels full of snow, change 18 million diapers, give 365 baths. Learn that grape juice, even in a sippy, is a very BAD idea if your child is wearing any clothing at all, and an ESPECIALLY bad idea if that clothing is yellow. Install two different kinds of car seats, buy millions of dollars worth of useless baby equipment. Take half of it back to the store. Read "Good Night Moon" enough to memorize it, then read it 50 million more times. Sing "Rock-a-bye Baby" until you're hoarse and then sing it ONE MORE TIME. Read 30 baby books, all telling you approximately the same thing (you know, the thing that doesn't work?).
Call the doctor in the middle of the night 10 times, 9 of which were not necessary. Call poison control and 911 at least once each.
Spend an infinite amount of time online searching out mysterious rashes and treatments for sleepless nights (ear plugs).
Replace the batteries in the lullaby CD player, camera and baby swing every third day. Take the batteries OUT of all the baby toys and the remote control.
Spend another million dollars on beauty products in an attempt to "recapture" your youth, just to discover that all you really need is sleep. Resign yourself to looking old.
Yes, it's been quite the year, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Grilled Cheese Pizza
4 weeks ago
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