Apr 18, 2012

CPS Visits and Other Family Fun

I am living my worst nightmare.
Today CPS came to my house and opened a file on my family.
For neglect.
I'm not even joking.
Are these people for REAL?!?!?

Apparently one of my neighbors doesn't think I should let my children play outside.
Basically, the CPS lady said it's OK for The Boy to be outside if he's going from our home to another home, but it is NOT ok for my kids to just play in the driveway and especially not ok for Zsa to be out there at all.

I don't know about you, but I find children that are hovered over have no real chance to exercise their imaginations and get truly involved in make-believe. The only other outdoor space we have is encased in 7 foot cinder-block walls. How is that at ALL appealing for anyone's imaginative play? Also, just because it APPEARS that I'm not watching, doesn't mean I'm not watching.

Why wouldn't whoever reported me just come TALK to me first? Maybe get an understanding of my parenting philosophy and THEN make a judgement call as to whether CPS was justified.

I am a stellar mother. My children have clean clothes to wear, a safe place to sleep, and healthy food to eat. I read to them daily, provide educational and age-appropriate toys, take them to music and swim classes and teach them about Jesus. I don't beat them, emotionally abuse them or allow them to be with people I don't fully trust. We provide a stable and loving environment in which boundaries are set and enforced and everyone's teeth get brushed. I'm June Cleaver but with a clue and some common sense.

I am ticked off and terrified all at the same time. Everything I am right now is tied to my role as Mother. My extra curricular activities consist of birth circle and babywearing meetings. I cloth diaper, for crap's sake! If that's not the sign of a devoted mother, I don't know what is. And today, someone came into my home, sat on my couch, and said I wasn't any good at this calling I've devoted my life to for the last five years. The essence of who I am right now has been attacked and I'm angry as hell. Even though I KNOW I'm a good mom, a tiny voice in the back of my brain is saying, "what if they're right? What if I'm doing it wrong?" Darn you, neighbor. Darn you, CPS. Go rescue some kids who actually need it.

What do I do? What would you do? In family court, you are guilty until proven innocent. So as far as CPS and the state of Arizona are concerned, I'm a neglectful parent.

5 comments:

Neff Family said...

I would be so angry! At first I thought this was a joke. That is insane, I'm so sorry!

Cormorant said...

That's just horrible. Far cry from the days when we use to roam free as kids where ever we wished.

Melissa Pate said...

Holy crap! I let my 5 and 3 year olds play out on my driveway while I watch from inside. That really scares me.

My Thoughts said...

Becky I'm so sorry to hear that this happened to you! Honestly of what I know I think you are a great Mom. I believe Satan will stop at nothing to help us Mom's think badly about ourselves yet in reality us Mom's are awesome and are doing an amazing work on the Earth. God knows what a great Mom you are and I believe you are a great woman of God!

Erin said...

I'd go punch all of my neighbors - that's right ALL of them - on the off chance that you'd get the one who is a tattle tale. Good grief, what a jerk. Seriously. There are kids out there who aren't eating because mom's high on crack and CPS leaves them alone. I am a firm believer that kids need to be outside and sometimes outside of parental "control" to become normal kids. By your neighbor's definition, I was raised in a home so neglectful, it's a wonder I'm not a mass murderer.