May 23, 2010

Adjusting...Or Not

The Baby is NOT doing well.
She hates that I'm gone some of the day at school. Here's the thing, I only leave twice a day. In the morning for about 90 minutes and in the evening for 2-3 hours.
We were about ready to wean, since she's almost 18 months. In fact, we were down to twice a day. Now every time I walk in the door, she wants to nurse. She pulls my shirt up any time I'm sitting down. And if I cave, then she gets mad there's not a full meal waiting there.
What on earth are we going to do in a few weeks when I need to be at school ALL day?
I knew going back to school was a bad idea. Really, I did.
I love my children, but they've become so difficult with all the changes being thrust upon them I feel a sort of relief when I need to leave the house and that's the worst part; being happy to get away. I feel just awful.

The thing I keep coming back to is, it's never going to be easier that it is now to finish school. We'll just have more kids later. And it's never going to be cheaper than it is now, because the cost of school always goes up.
These things make logical sense, but 18-month-olds and 3-year-olds are NOT logical. Not even a little bit.

All they know is their mommy, who is always there, suddenly isn't. And now she's cranky, too.
Sorry babies! I hope you are young enough to forget this summer. I know it has scarred me for life.

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